Anger

I have a lot of anger pent up lately. I doubt that it is very healthy at all. It's hard to... You know, run it through the right filters so it's not harmful to me. Sometimes I just want to scream at the top of my lungs. But I try to turn it into exercise or something good. It's not easy to actually get up and do something when all I feel like doing is sitting and just not caring.

But I have to care! If something is going to hurt, I'm gonna change it around into something that will benefit me. I don't want to be angry all the time. Or depressed. Or sad.

I guess this post really had no point. I just felt that I should write stuff down a little bit. Who really cares what I did today or whatever. I DID get to see Sam. That boy...

. . .

Fuck everything.

I don't ever say that word. EVER. I don't think I've ever said it in my entire life. But it's the only thing I feel like saying right now.

I'm going to blow out my freaking eardrums by how loud I listened to this Stupid Love Letter song over and over.

I have no idea whether he gives a shit about me at all. I don't understand. People I hardly ever talk to talk to me more than he does. I'm just so frustrated.

Now I feel like crying. I can't cry again. Not anymore. I was finally okay...

WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO FEEL!?!?!??!

Stupid Love Letter

So I took all night to write this stupid love letter to you.

Yeah, you. From me, to you.

And all the time that I wasted on this stupid love letter to you.

Fuck you!

From me.

To you.

You said no. No...

Best lyrics EVER right now. *bangs head against something*

I need to run. Need to let out the anger, anxiety, and frustration.

Thank you for exercise, God.